unimpressed

alright to keep it simple, this week was kind of a let down. i had some plans set out and they pretty much all went busto so heres how it went

poker turned out crappy for what i did play. i ended up running a little bad and from what i remember it was mostly just coolers and slightly bad play but not much. i still feel like im playing decently but im not playing my A game. none the less it still should be enough to beat 10nl on merge. if it wasnt for rakeback  i would be stuck for the month but ive earned like 45$ in rakeback so im sitting up like 25$ in profit for this month. i still have a couple days left to make a little more. fingers crossed that i dont lose and have my first losing month in 2 years. ill have the graph up on the next post.

daygame was just horrible this weeknd. friday i went out after work for 2 hours and approached 2 girls which wasnt a bad thing for a friday during the day but i only talked to one of the girls for like 5 minutes before i got a boyfriend rejection from her. although i was more persistent in the conversation which was one thing i was working on so that was probably the only positive thing this weeknd. saturday there was an airforce air show going on where they let you on the military base and you can check out all the air crafts and they have a stunt team come up and do jet stunts and stuff like that. the actual show was pretty cool but ive seen it a few times and i was pretty much there for the girls. only one slight problem. i hardly saw any approachable girls. now i wish i could make this up, but i doubt that even 1% of the girls there were approachable. it just made me remember one of the main reasons i hate alaska. anyways i did approach 4 girls 3 of which gave me bf rejections instantly. the one girl that didnt was actually probablly the hottest girl that i saw there. she had a nice big ass with a sexy body and she was blonde wearing yoga pants.

just one of those girls when you see you go GOT DAMN! anyways i approached her but she didnt hook and kept walking. in the next few weeks or maybe all of next month im going to try and switch it up a little bit with my opener and see what kind of different results i get. basically to see if i get more girls to hook right off the opener more or not, just mixing it up a little bit.

life seemed alright though just got back into the work routine after jumping around shifts a little bit. were back to working 6 days a week 12 hours a day though so we'll see how long that goes for. hopefully till the end of season cause i love me some money. the air show was cool as i already stated besides the lack of the attractive female genitalia. the last interesting subject in the life section this week was the girl ive been seeing. so today i actually saw her and we hung out a for a bit. she basically told me how shes getting more attached to me and falling for me and stuff like that. i expected this and was waiting for this. the fact is that im getting attached to her too. i like us being together and everything is going great but im still going to keep it a summer relationship and i told her that. im not leading her on and im not using her and told her that. i also told her i didnt want her to have this big thought that if she waits for me that we will be together in the end and she had mixed thoughts about that. in the end i wont fall in love with this girl cause i dont want that in my life anytime soon which i also made sure she knew about. it sounds a little fake like i can just turn love on or off but for me as a person i can resist actually feeling the "emotions" of love if i dont want to. which is now.

ive been totally honest with her this whole time and tell her everything so that i dont lead her on and shes still sticking around so we'll see how long it goes. in the end theres gonna be a break up. either when i leave to florida or before that. i think she might just be crazy enough to want to wait for me though   : /

so thats how things have gone so far this week a little mehhh for the most part and a little ughhhh with the females but nothing nobody cant handle. lets pray to the poker gods for a winning last 2 sessions and to the daygame goddesses for a plentiful harvest lol. anyway untill next time cosmonauts, stay tuned :)

drama!!

alright so last week i said i would have some juicy details for this week and ive got a pretty entertaining story for you guys, also this post will be long to forewarn you so here goes

 i was out friday after work running some daygame. things were going ok there was an ok amount of people in the mall so i figured the day might go productively. well my first approach ended really short after she raised her hand to me to show me her ring. after that i saw a girl that i knew that works at a jewelry store in the mall and went over and talked to her. i asked her if she saw what i just did and then told her i just tried to hit on a married woman. we talked for a little bit until i saw another girl in a short dress walk by. i told her ok watch me get rejected again and i ran after the girl in the dress. after approaching the girl things started to go really well and i was progressing with the conversation smoothly. i ended up suggesting to get smoothies and she agreed and we headed to the escalators and then things got a little more interesting.

 just before we step onto the escalators i hear a familiar voice that says " hi Alan" i look over i see the girl that i have been seeing for the pat 3 months... uh oh lol. i go over to her and give her a hug and say hi. i was caught and didnt know what to do. i went back to the girl in the dress as my other girl walked away. i told the girl i had to go talk to my friend and she said ok. i ran after my girl and tried to talk to her but she wasnt having it and was pretty pissed. she ended up leaving the mall.

 about 20 minutes later after a few text messages she calls me and we talk shortly and i got her to agree for me to go see her at her house. when i get there we talked about what i was doing and anything she wanted to know. i didnt feel like i had anything to hide and i like being completely honest so thats what i did.

i told her how i ran daygame and why i did it. what i told her though was that i am doing daygame right now for practice so that i can keep my social skills sharp with women. i made her understand and since we arent truely "dating" she was a little more ok with me just talking to girls which when it comes down to it thats all it was cause i havnt had sex with a different girl since seeing her. she wasnt 100% ok with me doing it though and i do agree it is a little disrespectful if i were to sleep with other girls. she didnt want me doing it anymore and im kinda on the fence about it. i still want to practice but im not going to ruin whats going on cause its exactly what i was looking for this summer. i might chill out for the rest of the month but we'll see

 besides that little encounter i ended up meeting a guy from one of the pick up forums online and met him friday night when me and my girl and 2 of her friends went out. he seemed like an alright guy. he was asian and in the military but pretty decent guy. there were some differences though which were, he does night game and i hardly do, and he doesnt really follow a system or do anything ive seen that you learn really. he just seemed like he does whatever but if it works for him then thats cool. he came out with me saturday afternoon though when i went back out to run more day game. (yeah i didnt stop after the friday encounter) he never did a day time approach before but he seemed up for it. i did 8 approaches that day and i didnt get anywhere with any of them which was pretty lame i was actually suprised really. he ended up doing 1 which was cool for his 1st time. im not sure if we will hang out more or not. our styles are different and unless he wants to do more daygame i probably wont go out during the nights hardly at all.

 so to continue in the running theme ill talk about the events in life that took place. work ended up slowing down. were back on "maintanence" since its slowed down a bit meaning we're only working 40 hrs a week for the next week or 2. no biggie though. i also went to the citizens cope concert on saturday which was a little bit of a let down. first off when i purchased the tickets i thought it was going to be in the indoor theater place. well guess it was in the outdoor theater place. no biggie if only it wasnt raining that day. so we just got an unbrella and went anyway. well aparently i guess my girl thought she was going to be sitting at a concert so she wore heels that hurt her feet after standing in them for 10 minutes so she started complaining about that and then there was just a whole lot of people just standing around talking and drinking beer instead of listening to the music that they paid to go see so it was all just a little annoying and we left halfway through. i liked the music but the experience was a little annoying

.

 poker however is the one thing for once that has me smiling. well on friday i was able to win 4 buyins and come back from a 15k hand break even stretch. on sunday i played again and made 3 more buyins and with the rake back an a couple 5$ bonuses this month im finally sitting in the black 63$. since im only working 40hrs a week for however long i should be able to put in more volume for the rest of the month, variance depending maybe i can bring this month out of the slumps

thats about it for that week. hopefully things will be more productive this week and a lot less drama filled. those are the hopes anyways. so until next time cosmonauts, stay tuned  :)

mmhhmmmm

theres such things as bad days right. well just think of this week as one long bad day and see if we can start off better this next week. thanks all mighty viewer of the universe.

that was putting it short. to go into detail it seems like things are definitely on a downswing. ill start with life which i guess there might be a little negative view to it. so pretty much life is the same. this last week there wasnt a whole lot of excietment going on just kinda worked, played poker, ran daygame, and hung out with friends. this upcoming saturday though is a concert being preformed by citizens cope which im super excited for. so everything seemes to be going smooth just grinding away at life and counting down the days till nomvember 1st. the only bad thing i can think of is its getting a little slow at work so our hours might get slimmed back to 40-50hrs a week. isnt necessarily a bad thing but when im working my summer job i like to put in the hours but no biggie.

poker will be the start of the rant i suppose. this week although i only played about 4000 hand i pretty much saw it all. bad beat, coolers, suck outs, miracles, pretty much the works. top that off with playing mediocre and it accounts for a downswing. although since getting rakeback i am pretty close to breaking even for the week. i think im down 2 or 3 buyins for the month.

hope i can bring it back and continue my non losing streak for another month. kinda sucks only putting in about 5-7k hands a week cause as many online players know sometimes a swing can last as long as 25k hands and in some cases 50k hands. i remember when i was 24 tabling 10nl on stars i had a 50k hand breakeven stretch. but since i was 24 tabling it only lasted about 10 days. hope that isnt the case here.

that leads me to a couple things. although i like the idea of money back. i hate the idea of only winning because you make money from rakeback. i take a lot of pride in being a winning player and just the thought of knowing that you cant beat poker except from rakeback is kinda a slap in the face to me. the other topic is the actual thoughts and feelings you have when you are losing. its kinda funny cause when you lose or at least with me theres always that second guessing yourself that maybe you are doing something wrong and a big leak came into your game or you are getting really outplayed and 100 other thoughts when really it could just be variance. part of the game but its funny that i think that way. what can i say poker is more fun when you are winning.

pickup is pretty much following the same course as poker to an extent. although im not doing horrible at daygame this month, the results are not there. this friday and saturday i was able to approach 3 girls and thats it. for the most part there wasnt that many approachable girls out this weeknd and some of the girls i saw i had concerns of wether or not they might not be old enough or a couple other lame excuses. i did however talk to a girl on saturday who looked white but she was egyptian and thai. really cute girl. i was able to get her number but i have my doubts and think she is ultimately going to flake.

i texted her yesterday after we talked just to establish contact basically and she didnt text back. so ill text her a couple more times in the next few days and if no replies than ill move on.

i know the main problem as to why they flake and is because im not building enough comfort in the first interaction. i generate attraction and things are going good, but then they have to go or i forget to bridge into comfort or hardly go into details about myself. so attraction is really good for getting the number but if you dont build the comfort there not going to reply to the text. im trying to work on it but if im only approaching 3 girls a weeknd its a little difficult. none the less it seems like my number close rate is holding steady at about 20% still a pretty small sample but i think im pretty confident in saying that i can number close 1 in 5 girls.

another quick story was on friday when i went out after work. the only girls i approached were these 2 girls in short dresses and they looked all dressed up for somthing. anyway i approached them and it was going good. turns out they are interns for a big business company and were on a coffee break. the main problem was that the girl on the left was a 6.5 and the girl on the right was a 7.5 and i wasnt really interested in the girl on the left. the problem was that the girl on the left was showing all the signs that she was interested in me. laughing at everything i said. preening her hair constantly, investing in the conversation a lot etc. the girl on the right didnt really seem that interested. well i didnt want to basically reject the girl on the left and just go for the girl on the right so i just winged it and told them that i would take them both out and they could fight to the death over me. in a joking manner of course.

the girl on the right took my number which i hardly ever give out my number and then we went seprate ways. plain and simple id give it a 5% chance that either of them contact me and thats the main reason i try to always get there number rather than give mine so i consider that a fail as well.

all in all the week wasnt horrible but i still could have had a lot better results. but thats about it for this week next week im hoping for some good juicy details to fill you guys in on so untill next time cosmonauts. stay tuned :)

....

so to keep it simple theres really not much that happend this week. i ended up getting the 3rd and 4th off of work and didnt really do anything except hung out with friends. i did actually buy a small go kart that goes like 20mph :) im gonna try to re gear it to make it go faster but yeah i wanted a go kart ever since i was like 8. p.s. i do have a huge kid side in me.

 there really isnt much to be said about poker i think i played a total of 3 sessions this last week because the way the week played out i didnt really plan on playing much. what i do remember is that i wasnt running that well but i was still breaking even pretty much. i think im sitting down like 1 buy in or somthing. this week everything is pretty much back to normal so ill put in a good 4 sessions of poker or so.

 pick up also was pretty lame this week. went out friday and saturday and had a combine total of 3 approaches woooo! 1 number which i think is pretty flaky i just texted her though so we'll find out. i did miss out on a few opportunities this weeknd though with younger girls. im ok with talking to girls that are 18 but they have to look mature. there was a few approaches i could have done but i wasnt sure if the girls were even 18 so i didnt. kinda made me feel like i wimped out.

 well my schedule has returned to normal pretty much. im back working 12 hours a day and we worked this sunday so im not sure if were back working 7 days a week or 6 but we'll see. so im back to the routine of poker mon-thur, pickup fri and saturday and possibly sundays. any way that girl ive been seeing is coming over so i gotta wrap this up for some "snuggle time" untill next time cosmonauts. stay tuned :)

redo

there have been a couple events that have taken place since the last post that are a bit interesting so here goes.

 so the main two events that happened this week have taken place in the life category. so in my last post i mentioned that i cut it off with the girl i was seeing, well after a few days of not talking we ended up seeing each other again to talk about everything and welllll i guess im going to be a dad!.... no just kidding haha. we did decide to keep seeing each other and its mainly from what ive come to realize. ive only been running pickup for a year and ive only really got into it this last 6 months and put a lot of effort into day game so its still relatively new to me. that being said this is my first "relationship" that im doing that im not trying to make it anything serious come out of it so thats new to me too. when i started game i had this thought that i could have a short term relationship and just not have any emotional attachment to the girls but still be able to appreciate and enjoy their company. well after this week i was a little enlightened.

 to me you can have three basic types of relationships. really short term,  casual short term and long term.  a really short term relationship would be like a 1 night stand or maybe something that didnt last more than a month. a casual short term for me is somthing between 1 and 6 months and long term would be anything more than 6 months. i knew even before i got into game that i didnt want to do a long term realtionship again. maybe in the future but not anytime soon. short short term relationships are fine but i like being able to connect with people and having a new girl every month isnt really all it would be cracked up to be. i do however like the thought of having a short term casual relationship. going into this i thought that i could leave all attachment out of the equation but then realized that if i want to do a short term casual relationship than emotions will get envolved and there will be some form of attachment which ive come to accept and is the main reason why me and the girl have continued to see each other.

i know that was a whole lot of nonsense but i had to kind of explain myself. the good thing about my lifestyle is that i pretty much move out of state every 6 months so it gives me an "excuse" to have a short term casual relationship, and really im only with girls who are ok with the idea of it.

now for the second main event of the week which was my friends 21st bday. his actual bday was on wednesday and we had 4 friends go out and get food and order some drinks and had a good time but it was saturday night where all the action took place. so me my friend who turned 21 and another friend all went out for the night on the town and started kicking back the drinks. we pretty much just stuck with jagger the whole night. after a couple hours my friend whos bday it is, was starting to feel pretty good. he hardly ever drinks but when he does he bassically gets so out of line that its funny to watch. anyway we were all getting loose and having a good time.

the girl im seeing came out with a friend and we hung out for a little bit and then somwhere along the line we crossed the point of no return. my friend got to that ignorant stage of drinking and i became the babysitter. that was all in the plans though we were basically trying to make him not be able to remember the night. we bounced to like 4 or 5 different clubs and just did a whole lot of whacky ignorant things and basically just had a really fun night. we got back to my place at 5am at which point i had been up for 30 hours and then we just passed out. right now im actually sitting infront of my friend as he lays passed out on my couch. hahah good times.

now for the monthly recap of my pickup results. so the beginning was really slow for pickup. i had some things i had to get done and  then ended up getting my tonsils taken out. about 3/4s of the way through the month i had some days off and a festival was going on downtown and i busted out a lot of approaches. this last weeknd was reallly lame though. i went out and was really out of state and just not in the mood to do any daygame and only did 1 approach :( but for the month i was able to get 27 approaches done. not too bad seeing how things went and actually with my work schedule i think anything near 25 approaches is decent. this winter i should be able to do like 60-75 a month though. i did see an increase in my numbers to approaches ratio. even though it was only over 27 approaches i got 5 numbers which was pretty close to 20%. where i would usually only get the number about 10% of the time. im still working on my game after getting the number so definitely still trying and needing to improve. the first girl whos number i got was a really sweet nice and young girl and she actually texted me first. the only thing was that she was so nice and innocent i would feel bad introducing her into my life and then not going anywhere with it cause she was gf material. the next girl i really connected with as well but she ended up having a kid so i cut that out too. the next 3 were just flakes. so i didnt sleep with anyone either so no stats for that. i am still sleeping with the chick im seeing just not anyone new. 

you might also ask. "why do you still do pickup if youre seeing someone thats so disrespectful". my  view is that im still trying to improve my life and being able to talk with and attract females so im fine with the idea of doing approaches and dont think its reallya bad thing to be sociable. however im not trying to go out and have sex with new women now that im seeing this girl but if somthing came up i dont think i should limit myself if theres somthing better for me. its a little fucked up but if i was in a "committed" relationship, then i wouldnt do any of this.

last but not least is poker. now this is pretty much where it has just been pretty much an angle upwards. being that i had 2 weeks off from work for my tonsils to recover it gave me plenty of time to play poker. the only bad thing is that my hem2 kept getting error codes and i had to delete everything twice so i lost about 25k hands worth of data. not that big of a deal but it messed up my sweet looking graph for the month. i was also able to land rake back to at 35% so thats just a little extra money back. i won a couple sign up bonuses which added up to like 20$. so with everything said and done im up 320$ for the month or 32 buyins at 10nl. i was up to 350$ but my last session sucked and lost a few buyins. i dont know exactly how many hands i played but i think its somewhere between 40-45k so its ok volume for merge

i like how things are going and i can play 12 tables comfortably whenever they are available. with me back working 12 hours a day 6 days a week i wont have a whole lot of time again but i think 25k hands a month is doable. also i dont see myself losing at 10nl and i would be confident saying im sure i can beat 25nl. but im just gonna grind 10nl for the summer and move to florida and then ill step up to 25nl just to keep the mind fresh and practice online while i kill it in the live games. ohhh man i cant wait. so heres the graph for the last 18k hands

it obviously doesnt show the other 20-25k hands i played before hem2 crapped out and the other 260$ of profit but ehhh no biggie. anyway i know this was really long and probablly mundane and boring but i had a lot of shit to talk about and had to do the whole month recap. things are going good though and just 4 more months till florida baby! until next time cosmonauts, stay tuned :)